03 January 2013 @ 12:34 am
Neal went home. I feel better knowing I'll have time to write and stuff. He was here for 10 days. My socializing quota has been met for the next two months.

We had a bit of a fight earlier today but all is resolved now. I might talk about that more in a later entry; it was such a rollercoaster day.

Instead I thought I'd share this cute story with you guys.

So when Neal left this evening (after my raid), he left something in my apartment for me to find. He wasn't gone very long before my sister decided that she would help me look for it. He told Wendy that it would be in a really obvious spot, I couldn't possibly miss it. So we look everywhere and FINALLY, Wendy finds it pillow. -_-

Pictures under cut. )
27 December 2012 @ 06:28 pm
I've gotta say, I wish I wasn't an introvert. There are lots of really cool introverted characters in games/movies/TV/etc., but nothing takes the pressure off of being an introvert in real life except maybe the knowledge that comes with being one yourself. (It gives you leeway to write about introverts with because you know.)

It's of very little consolation. At the end of the day, you still face the troubles befalling an introvert In Real Life.

This is why, despite the fact that I love being represented by characters in odd ways (blondes! introverts! personality matches! moral values!), at the end of the day, I realize it matters very little beyond a very surface approach.

For example, if someone bothered to write a toothless character into a book/movie/manga/whatever, I doubt it would really boost my self-esteem. I doubt it would make me feel awesome. Why? Because at the end of the day, I'm left feeling one of two things. Either:

A. I wish I was that person, they're so much cooler than me despite having the same [insert problem/issue/etc here]. :(
or B. Well that was cool, but they're not real, and people don't always react that way, so while this is nice and it pleases me to see this used...I can separate this enough in my mind that it doesn't have a profound effect on me.

This isn't always true. For example, I've been delighted beyond belief to find characters that I could relate to a lot. Lyndis, for example. Raine Sage. Jill. Farina. Oscar François. This list goes on, even including some male characters--because personality is personality!

At the end of the day, though, it doesn't matter how much I wish I looked like/acted like/was [insert character here], because it's not going to happen. The best I can ever hope is to cosplay them.

Not that I want to lose my family to a bandit attack (Lyndis), be abandoned by my parents and have to raise a sibling (Raine), have to kill my own father (Jill), be so dependent on money that I can't trust people (Farina), or have an identity crisis (Oscar)...because I don't. But the characters are still relateable and fun and just generally they are something to me that I can never actually be myself.

It's kind of sad, really, how much I wish I could just sort of...take their place. I guess I never really got too much into RP because I know I need to toe the line between reality and fantasy and I can't afford to tip too far into fantasy-land and let myself wish too hard for something to be real that cannot ever be real. It's sad, I know!

But here's the clincher:

Characters are generally very 2D.

Granted, some games (RPGs) give us characters who are better-balanced, but even our likely-to-be-an-introvert (and likely-to-be-an-extrovert) characters...don't really show us anything beyond surface introvert/extrovert tendencies.

Let's look at Raine, because I'm on such a Symphonia kick. She is a teacher, so you'd think, "Oh, she works with other people. She must be an extrovert!" But then you see that she actually keeps most things to herself, only really opens her mouth when she knows she's going to be right--or has a really good guess--and/or nobody else will speak up, so then you think, "Hey, maybe she's actually an introvert."

Keep moving through the story, and you think, "Either way, it doesn't affect the storyline. She's a private person. She keeps to herself. She shares very little and denies a lot of things that might otherwise give the party more information about herself. But this doesn't really scream introvert or extrovert. It's just...her."

I think it's pretty safe to assume that Raine doesn't exactly thrive on the company of other people, so let's say she's an introvert for simplicity's sake. But this isn't brought up in the game and then only makes sense to bring up in fanfiction. But when does this matter? Possibly never. Not many people write stories about Raine and bring up her needing time alone--or wanting it. In fact, most of the time, people assume that, because she spends so much time alone or around her brother, because she doesn't share things with other people, that she's secretly dying inside to share her space and heart and body with someone else. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm a shipper. I love writing and reading romance despite being aromantic in real life. But people who are alone sometimes...enjoy...being...alone.

Okay wow. Shock and gasp. Lots of characters spend time alone and possibly don't enjoy it--or would be okay with being around others depending on who that other person is--but nobody writes about Raine Sage dealing with being an introvert. Or...any character...dealing with being an introvert. To the best of my knowledge.

This has a personal point, I swear.

Personal hooplah under here. )

It's a lot harder to deal with being an introvert than I could have ever thought.
23 December 2012 @ 12:45 am
I have gotten super lazy about updating this thing and for that I do apologize. Neal is coming down tomorrow. :)

fandom post on regal bryant coming soon to a journal near you

would be faster but I keep tl;dring omg.
10 December 2012 @ 01:04 pm
I tanked a dungeon last night for Neal. Got the dumbest DPS on the planet. His typing is bad but I thought this was a cute uhm...bit.


01 December 2012 @ 04:04 am

you know

I'm not sure why it makes me happy to tank dungeons for my boyfriend.

I mean I love tanking dungeons for other people but.

It's fun to do them for someone you care about, too. ??? I don't know.

He's trying to get used to his old shaman (healer) after not really playing since raiding ICC. His time is so limited that it's hard for him to get much done, buuuut of course I will tank for him whenever I can cause I am baws like that.

...I really need to get to bed. Dx
27 November 2012 @ 01:50 pm
Neal and I were texting:

Me: Just punch me already so I finish this paper.
Him: Do you want me to punch you so you can draw inspiration and reference* material for your paper? (sorry bad taste but I couldn't help it with your topic and all)

*he actually wrote "reverence" LOL.

Woowwww got no words. I can't believe I walked into that. /idiot

also before anyone gets worried about this: Neal wouldn't hurt a fly. Seriously.
01 November 2012 @ 12:05 pm
So I was sitting there minding my own business then the postal truck comes up the driveway. I'm a bit surprised, because I didn't think that anyone in the house had a package coming, but I figured it was a part for the CR-V my dad is fixing up (he's gotten into buying wrecked cars and all that--we look like a used car lot).

Then comes my brother with this giant ass box.

It's from Neal of course.

Inside are lots of wads of newspaper (PREWADDED NEWSPAPER WHICH WILL BE USED TO START FIRES IN THE STOVE YEAHHHHH he has no idea how awesome that part is, no really)...and a bucket full of candy.

And here I thought he had asked about candy regarding Sweetest Day (years ago when we weren't even dating he sent me gifts for Sweetest Day), but I think that's already passed? I DON'T KNOW. Anyway apparently it was a Halloween question. HAHAHAHA.

Eff yeah, I was completely out of junk food. :P
10 October 2012 @ 09:07 pm
WHO WANTS TO SEE PIKTURZ?! Of Neal and his new kitten!!! YEAHHHH!!!

Warning: cute as fuck kitten in here gaiz.

Snip snip! )

Her name is Mica (Mee-kuh). I want to pet dat widdle kitteh belleh.
15 September 2012 @ 11:25 pm
Neal has acquired a new kitty.

She doesn't have a name yet but...any ideas? :U I'm bad at helping with this "naming" thing.

22 July 2012 @ 05:18 pm
I am very excited! I've gotten a LOT cleaned and organized, and my front room looks nice for once! I mean, the carpet is still like 50 years old and ugly but there are BOOKS and a TV in there and...the BEST PART, my parents let me haul their exercise bike upstairs! /o/ It's a really nice one, but nobody has even used it since they bought it, so MINE MINE MINE. I'm so happy about this, you guys have no idea. I love biking! But I hate going outside in the cold or hot, and the only safe place to bike (hilly Ohio, dontchaknow) is a trail 30 miles away. I love going there sometimes, but it'll be nice to be able to just bike inside! And to make things even sweeter, my dad gave my brother a TV, he gave it to Tim and Wendy, and they gave it to me. Along with a DVD player. The TV is...actually nicer than the one I already have in my living room, but my living room is stuffed full already, and the entertainment center holds a 27" TV-- this one is...32"? It also has problems visually, since it's one of those fancier newer types and it got ruined in places. But the picture is good enough for in there I think.

However, the front room is nice and roomy now, so I moved the desk from the bedroom (old family desk) into my front room, but the bigger TV on it (it might be a thin TV but it weighed a ton), and then hauled the bike upstairs to face it. Ohhhh man coolest thing ever. I think I'll save watching DBZ for when I exercise. It just makes sense!

Do do doooooo!

I work tomorrow and Tuesday but I have the rest of the week off to visit with Neal, yay. :D I'm a little nervous about this visit because he's never been here (but I've been to see him a few times), so I'm busy hoping nothing stupid/horrible/embarrassing happens. To try and cut back on that I've decided he'll use my bathroom since I have a better/nicer/newer bathroom, and we'll probably spend most of the time upstairs. I haven't made any concrete plans because I've got no idea what the weather is gonna be like.
07 June 2012 @ 08:02 am
So yesterday my internet I had to drive into work.

I got home to find a card from Neal on my desk.

That means he'd had to have sent it out the day after I left cause...well...I left on Sunday and it was only Wednesday.

Anyway, it was a nice mushy sort of letter. :P And he said he was confused about the conclusion I reached while in Wisconsin ("In that way I'm a lot like our pal Kraft Lawrence...") so to try and make things as obvious as possible, my response via text was, "Just call me Holo. Aroooo!" But then he was like


you play the role of Holo fairly well.

And I'm over here like

wait a minute. should I be insulted by that or what? Cause we did spend a lot of time trying to figure out if Holo is just naturally bitchy or what. Either way, lolz, okay.jpg.

Today is a good day. I have the day off. :3
30 May 2012 @ 10:10 pm
Okay, well, I'm tired as hell, but I need some wind-down time before I hop in the car and take off, y'know? So I'm going to play a bit of WoW before I go to sleep.

Also, wow, LOL, I want to rewatch ALL THE THINGS these days. I get urges to reread DBZ (but can't find the manga ANYWHERE), get urges to watch Ranma 1/2 (which I'm doing) and InuYasha (which I did last year in June). fdlsjfkldsjfdsl

So anyway, I'm also gonna fill out a bday card for Neal.

But yeah. At 4am or so I'm leaving for four days and I'm not taking my computers or anything, not even one of the laptops. Too lazy. Also who has time to Internet?

19 May 2012 @ 12:05 am
I have been called many things on the phone since starting at Scotts. Most people either can't hear me when I say my name, or they just assume it's not really what they heard. So I have been called:

Nana <--most common

Every now and then someone says, "Manna? Like from heaven?" but for the most part I'm called one of the above things by random strangers. It's both hysterical and ridiculous. Especially Leila. Where did that guy even get that? NOT EVEN CLOSE. LOL!


So here is my dilemma. I am going to Wisconsin. For Neal's birthday. What do I get him?!


Also gonna wait to bleach my hair until Sunday...or Wednesday next week. It's a little dry. :/ Though I should mention my hair looked okay in the picture I posted but IRL it looks pretty stupid. The back is all this awful blonde and only the front looks cool. I look like someone threw some sherbet ice cream or some shit on my head. Orange, pink, and white-blonde.
15 May 2012 @ 12:05 pm
1.) Lol. >:]

2.) Dying my hair brown soon. The pink is nice but I might have a court date coming up, and as much I'm all don't-judge-others-for-their-appearance, I'm not about to get the fuck judged out of me when it actually counts.

3.) Asked for four days off around June 1st. Gonna go visit Neal if I can get the days off.